Quietly watching Modern Family minding my own business when out of the blue someone says, “Misty, you are being so aggressive.”
**I haven’t said a single word in about 25 minutes. I think I’m being the complete opposite of “aggressive” I’m not even laughing out loud. I haven’t even looked at you or asked you a question. Geeze, I’m not even chewing on anything or getting up for refills. How in the actual hell am I being aggressive? Now, I’m replaying the past 25 minutes of my life as fast as I can through my head trying to figure out why they just said that. (getting aggressive now)
What do you mean?
Well, you and I are two different types of aggressive people. You say what’s on your mind and apologies for it later. I set goals and finish them.
I’m not saying you can’t finish goals…
**Choose your words carefully. I know I have some hidden samurai powers in my Asian genes somewhere, and I will end you.
You just have this round-about way of being bossy. You don’t directly boss people around. You strongly suggest they do it a different way… which is the way you would do it.
**YOU DON’T EVEN KNOW BOSSY.
For example: “Did you cook the vegetables for 10 minutes?? It’s only supposed to cook for five!”
**BECAUSE that’s what the flippin’ instruction says!
By the way, there is tilapia on the stove. I didn’t make sides. It’s just meat.
**What. You made veggies. That IS a side, you freak.
And I’m baking chicken. How long do you think it should cook at 350 degrees?
It’ll probably take 30-40 minutes.
It only takes 20 minutes.
**Then why did you ask me…
I think you should go. I’m kicking you out, actually.
**DON’T LAUGH OUT LOUD
Allllriiight. See ya.
That’s it? You’re just leaving.
**Text me when your period is over. HOLY MOLY.
Ok, I’ll give you a call tomorrow.